September 11, 2011

Competition Entry #8

Today's entry is a bit of a black sheep, literally. No fancy chrome parts, no specially imported parts from Japan or pieces of art handcrafted from hi-tech super, quite the opposite actually. I'm not sure if the story with the dung fork is true or not, though....

It was a rainy evening in July when I sat on my veranda after work and let my mind wander while I took a sip of cool milk. Holger said that I finally have to fix the old bike. I always use all the things until they are beyond remedy and in general I would just be a simple, heartless farmer-soul. Granted, he wasn't completely at fault. Constantly just work, work, work and if there is some time left I am always sitting on my veranda with milk and letting my mind wander. Nine years ago I bought a SR500 from my neighbor. YOM ’80. He rather wanted to fix it on his own, but broke his hip while boinking someone and finally decided to buy one with an e-starter. Back then I didn’t tell Holger that I promised him a nice chopper with a lot of chrome, a sissy bar and a fox-tail just because I wanted him to take a few bucks for a rundown Japanese out of a wet cellar. And I promised him a trip, with an orange helmet, across the Alps to the ocean so that he can have a look at the ocean for the first time.

Of course I have just used it since then. I put away the milk and got started. I cut off the rear of the seat which was rotten already. I found a piece of foam on the garden swing and I offered up the right leg of my rain pants for the covering. I thought that if the seat is repaired, I won’t need them anymore. The calving rope which functioned as an accelerator cable for three years wasn't that good anymore. I substituted it by a piece of wire from the electric fence on which I casted two new stannic nipples. It got easily through the old envelope by using a big dose of MoS2. After that the rear looked exceptional somehow but with so much rust and with this huge rear light it won’t pass the TÜV. Fortunately I found an old tractor rear light and a dung fork in the scrapheap, so that I was able to form a nice rear easily which was in accordance with Holger’s notion of aesthetic. Meanwhile it had become late and I felt relieved. It felt like a comfortable high. It was just me and technology.

I replaced the old cast wheels with spoke wheels and trail bike tires,which I bought long ago, and painted the whole composition with a deep, beamless black. It corresponded very well to the general view of the SR. And it strengthened my high. When the first rays of sunlight loomed on the horizon and the cows started to call for attention, I quickly cut two pieces out of the assembly line of the old potato digger to tinker some useful tank pads in order to protect the new lacquer.After I had taken care of the animals, I carved a stencil during breakfast. Holger always said that I am a shabby pussy because the other guys would always screw me when playing skat and I would never beat them. I was therefore quite amused of my idea to manifest this on my moped. (see side covers) It was still too wet for harvesting, so the I used rest of the afternoon to build a speedometer out of aluminum. The zero is at the top on the right. I always liked it if something works the other way around. In the afternoon I drove to the garage to pass the TÜV in order to bring the construction of this agricultural machine to a good end.

Technically the machine remains quite unspectacular. Used for the cattle drive and to drive towards the sunset. Just a simple farmer soul. 
Holger is gone long ago.

The thing with the dung fork is actually true! Check it out here

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